God Please take this

Have you ever found yourself struggling with the same thing time and time again? Getting tripped up in the same area countless times? I know this rings true for me. The root problem is always the same regardless of the area in my life.

I lose sight of who God says I am.

Which then leads to insecurities, discontentment and comparing myself to others. I journal and pray. I join Bible studies. I write verses of truth on index cards and plaster them on my mirror. All of which are great steps toward growth yet still I find myself tripped up by the same issues.

Monumental ah ha moments always come at the oddest times for me, and this time is no different.

I was working on a bracelet for leather creations one afternoon and decided to watch a bible study DVD that a friend loaned me. I was listening more than watching as the bracelet kept tangling and driving me crazy. The title of the study was “Be Still”. It was talking about experiencing God and growing in our relationship with Him. And how we as women and mothers say we are just so busy, and can't set aside quiet time with God. Yet, we MAKE the time for social media and our favorite evening shows. (Ouch! That hit home)

With that brief summary, this is what spoke loudest to me and was my “Ah ha moment”.

“You are so distracted with social media and what everyone else is doing. Let go of it!”

For me this is huge, I mean really HUGE! The fears of losing contact with people or being left out of events and the latest happenings are terrifying! (I know, there are a lot more terrifying things in this world) But seriously, I felt a bit in shock the rest of the day that I was even considering such a crazy act. There are just times when I know that I must step forward in obedience and this was one of those times. I believe its not so much that I'm really good at listening to God rather that I had reached a place of being absolutely sick and tired of fighting this battle. The moment of surrender.

I'm now a month into this fasting from facebook and instagram. I can say it hasn't been easy and I'm sure I've missed out on things. But already I see how wrapped up I was in life out there instead of focusing on the beautiful life God has blessed me with. I've had time to write, and I've truly been more content with my simple little life. I'm sure there is much more to all of this than I can see right now, a bigger picture. 

Today though, I struggle a little less with discontentment and see growth in one little area of my heart.

Songs always speak to me greatly and this one by Plumb has been a big part of my latest journey. One of the verses says, “Standing on a road I didn't plan, Wondering how I got to where I am, I'm trying to hear that still small voice, I'm trying to hear above the noise... How many times have you heard me cry out "God please take this"? How many times have you given me strength to Just keep breathing? Oh I need you God, I need you now.”

According to Rogan this is “Our song” and you can be sure that we both sing it at the top our lungs when it comes on the radio or solo at any given time. 

May we all remember to hear that still small voice and cry out to God for help, surrendering those distractions for a deeper contentment.

Thanks for reading