The first step

I'm hoping as I just start writing things will happen, the words that have been bouncing around in my head will just flow.

I have been dreaming of writing a blog for several months now and convincing myself that it just isn't the right time yet. Quite possibly it hasn't been the right time up to this point, or maybe I've allowed fear to hold me back.

Something has changed these past few weeks and I have had a renewed passion for writing.

I have know idea if now is God's timing for me to step out with this but I will continue to take steps of obedience and see where He leads me.

Let me back up... I attended a writers conference back in April. It was a huge deal for me to even sign up for it let alone go to it. I felt completely dis qualified. For cryin' out loud who am I to go to “writers conference?!” My amazing husband encouraged me to go. Seems I'm always pushed toward growth when I say yes to something that causes my hands to sweat and my heart to pound out of my chest. I was fed and filled up in a great way that weekend.

The main thing God kept laying on my heart was “Write” you've got a story to tell. I went in thinking the biggest story I have to tell is our journey of infertility and adoption. During my most painful years of infertility I found the most comfort in reading books that other women wrote on the topic. Who knows if I will ever write a book on infertility but I will hold on to it as a big picture dream of mine.

After the conference and after talking to friends and people I met there, I began entertaining the thought of starting a blog. I will confess, I struggle with acceptance and what people think of me. And honestly that is what has held me back even prior to the writers conference.

Yet God lovingly reminds me of this, “You live my precious daughter for an audience of one.” He is my audience and it's Him who I want to be obedient to. I have seen his grace and provisions poured out over my life time and time again when I say “Yes” to Him.

I feel like I should have a theme for this blog, Infertility, Family, Motherhood....oh, the list could go on. But I just can't fit my life into a box or the healing and restoration that God has done in my life. So maybe instead it's just a blog about an ordinary girl that has faced trials, made mistakes and experienced much of God's blessings and undeserved grace.

Thank you for taking this first step with me and reading my first blog post!