Bending beneath the weight of His wind

I walked around the house yesterday humming and singing "How he loves us" by David Crowder. It wasn't because I had recently heard it, for some reason It was just on my mind.
 
Then at college group last night we sang it. And in that moment sitting there in Jon and Lynsey's home I heard something so differently about the song I thought I knew well. The words of this song sank deeply into my heart and the words spoke directly to me.
 
He is jealous for me, loves like a hurricane, I am a tree bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy. When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory and I realize just how beautiful you are and great your affections are for me.
 Read more: David Crowder - How He Loves Lyrics | MetroLyrics
 

Of course, anytime a reference is made to a tree you have my attention. With the windy, rainy fall weather we recently had it is easy to see this analogy. I watch the trees behind our house as they all move together, swaying and bending with the wind. They would snap if they were stiff and rigid. So often I am rigid, anxious, trying to make a plan. Allowing desires and decisions to bog me down.

His words are clear to me,

"My love is like a hurricane and you are a tree, give in to my will, bend child".  
 
Last week at college group we were talking about being yoked with Jesus, how His yoke is light when we are walking with him, He is literally right beside us, carrying the weight. 
Matt 11:29

The discussion continued last night with Christ dwelling in us, not walking ahead of us dragging us along or behind us. But right with us, shouldering life with us.
The question was asked, "how do we show our gratitude to Christ for dwelling in us?" My first thought was I show my gratitude by thanking Him and praying and spending time with Him, which I think are all good things. But then someone answered they show gratitude by trusting him and his plan.  Not hanging on to entitlement, whining and sniffling that I didn't get my way. (paraphrased to my words) So easily I can feel entitled or whining because I want something different, a different path. The correlation between trust and gratitude never really clicked to me before that moment. Or maybe it had, but I heard it differently last night with the things that weighed heavy on my heart.

I'm rejecting his light burden when I hold tightly to my plans, my pain. And the vicious cycle begins. Self reliance, self focus, distrust, ingratitude. 


A 3x5 card fell out of my Bible this morning. And it laid on the floor for awhile. Finally after walking by it several times I reached down and picked it up. Here are the words I had written some time ago.


"Gratitude is the foremost quality of a believing disciple precisely because gratitude is what births trust- the true belief." I can't remember where I read this or who wrote it, I certainly can't take credit for it. But what perfect timing for it to fall out of my Bible.

Sometimes I just get tired of hurting and struggling with the same things over and over. And in my selfishness I want a solution, a simple answer, I want life to be a bit easier. How appropriate right now before Thanksgiving that the subject of gratitude comes up and how it all ties together.

So today I choose to trust Jesus, thanking him for walking with me, for bearing the weight of my burdens. I trust him with my hopes, dreams, plans... my life. Isn't that the least I can do! And in that surrender and trust I become a little less aware of my afflictions, and I am overcome with his peace.

As a close friend just said to me, " We will be hunched over old ladies together one day after years of bending."

May you bend in that rigid area of your life today and trust the path God has for you.

Thanks for reading.

"Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:7