I can recall the excitement I felt when my sister and I walked down the stairs Christmas morning to see a Mandy and Jenny doll (they were cool in the late 70's/early 80's) propped up next to our stockings. I remember eating coffee cake Christmas morning that was a gift from a distant relative, it came in a box and tasted extra fancy.
These few things stand out to me, and are tidbits of what make up my Christmas childhood memories. I'm sure my Mom was bustling around to make it special for all of us kids, shopping for My little Pony, Barbies, Cabbage Patch dolls and Transformers. We probably didn't show much appreciation for all the effort that went into making it special. Obviously I do remember the presents but the best memory is about the time spent together.
Now I'm a grown up (kinda), a Mom and a wife. The other day I started feeling sorry for myself and how this time of year just means added work for us women. Laundry, dishes, meals and all the responsibilities still need to be done plus ALL the extras seem to fall upon our shoulders. (I'm probably the only one that has these pity parties.)
There's just so much to do with buying gifts for family, friends, teachers, making cookies, decorating the house and the tree, even getting the tree... and the list could go on. We are hard on ourselves if it doesn't turn out just how we had planned and worry we forgot to buy a gift for someone.
Aside from the occasional pity party I was feeling pretty content with how we are "doing Christmas" this year, until I (shamelessly admit) scrolled through my Facebook feed. It really is so ridiculous, but I easily fall into comparing. It has a way of sneaking up on me so very subtle. One minute I am singing Christmas music and happy and the next I'm feeling like I'm not doing enough.
The truth is, we are doing enough and maybe we just need to stop.
Stop thinking she is a better Mom than you because (fill in the blank)!
You are a good Mom because of what you did today in the quiet. Just because it didn't get praised and noticed (on Facebook) doesn't mean it didn't happen.
Stop thinking she is a better wife than you because (fill in the blank)!
You are good wife because you support and help your husband daily, come along side him and be his friend.
Stop thinking she is a better friend than you because (You get the point)
You are a good friend because you saw a need and you met it, you were there for her and helped in a tangible way.
It's sad to say we live in an age where so much gets celebrated on Facebook and if it doesn't get said or documented there we feel as if it didn't happen. (Again, maybe I am the only one.)
So I will embrace these words myself. We are all doing the best we can, in spite of the challenges we are facing with everyday life, and still trying to make it the most wonderful time of the year. Maybe no one recognizes it or sees what you are doing. But that doesn't mean you aren't doing enough or are falling short.
The reality is, our kids will remember the most random things, probably not what we are placing the highest value in today. Just like my childhood memories. I'm sure my Mom never would've imagined those trips to the mall were so meaningful to me then and still are to this day.
What I am doing is enough.
What you are doing is enough.
May we each experience contentment right where we're at and enjoy the rest of this season.
Merry Christmas and thanks for reading friends.
